Investment Plans for 2009

[shushens]

Investment tips for 2009

With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros
and Acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America this might be some
good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next
expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make
some BIG bucks.

Watch for these consolidations in later this year:

1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R.
Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2. Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and
become: Poly, Warner Cracker.

3. 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.

4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will
merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa .

5. Fed Ex is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
Fairwell Honeychild.

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become:
Knott NOW!

And finally...

9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge under the new name:
TittyTittyBangBang